The Apostle Paul urges single people who have the ability to restrain sexual desire to abstain from sexual activity and to remain single. Singleness provides an individual with the opportunity
to be wholly devoted to God in a way that may not be possible in
marriage. If you are single, you should find out the purpose for your
life and discover how God wants you to serve Him during this time.

  1. If a single person knows that he or she does not have the ability to restrain sexual desire, it is an indication that he or she should eventually get
    1. The Apostle Paul speaks about the subject of marriage and says that it is good for a man not to "touch" a woman (1 Corinthians 7:1).
      1. Touch in this instance is referring to sexual intercourse and co-habitation.
      2. He is giving this advice so that people can avoid fornication
        (v. 2).
      3. Fornication has many consequences and risks:
        1. It prevents the emotional development of two individuals and keeps them from being able to properly relate to one another in a healthy way. This
          is true particularly for men.
          1. When two people do get married after fornicating or co-habiting, they often have challenges relating to one another emotionally. The man will not feel he
            has to change how he relates to the woman after he marries her because
            of how they related before marriage.
        2. It allows a person to receive the benefits of marriage without a commitment.
        3. It sets people up for their emotions to be damaged when one person decides it is time to move on and doesn't want to commit to the
        4. It can lead to unplanned pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.
        5. Although fornication is accepted as a societal norm, it is not right in God's eyes.
          1. Christians should not engage in fornication.
          2. The Word of God must be your standard.
        6. When you commit fornication, you sin against your own body.
      4. To avoid fornication, every man and woman should have his or her own spouse (v. 2).

  2. There are certain rights that spouses have within the institution of marriage (v. 3-5).
    1. You must render due benevolence to your spouse.
      1. Goodwill
      2. Kindness
      3. Sexual gratification
    2. Married people should not defraud one another or refuse their spouses the right to sexual gratification (v. 5).
      1. Never use sex, or the withholding of it, as a means to get back at your spouse, as a way to settle arguments or as a tool of manipulation to get
        your way.
      2. Abstaining from sex during a fast is not required; however, if you want to abstain from sexual activity during a period of fasting, consult your spouse and make sure that there is
        mutual consent for you to do so.
      3. Resume sexual activity in order to keep yourselves from being tempted to sin in this area.
    3. You may not always be in the mood to have sex, but always be willing to get in the mood.
    4. Sex is not everything in a marriage, but it is a very important aspect of marriage.
    5. Men and women must take care of their health in order to be able to sexually please their spouse.
      1. Proper diet and exercise are important.

  3. Paul believed that it is better to remain single than to get married.
    1. Paul had a "gift," or ability to refrain from sexual desire and activity with no problems; he did not have the desire to seek a wife (v. 27).
    2. Paul was able to completely devote himself to the Lord because he was single.
    3. If you have the "gift" that Paul had, you don't need a mate.
    4. Don't let people pressure you into getting married.
    5. Being single and whole is a powerful combination.
    6. Singleness doesn't mean loneliness.
    7. Single people have an advantage over married people in that they can be completely devoted to the Lord with no distractions.
      1. There are things you can do as a single that you may not be able to do once you are married. Example: God may give you personal ministry
        opportunities where you may travel or serve at your own leisure without
        having to answer to or ask permission from a spouse.
      2. Single people can focus solely on pleasing God whereas married people must focus on pleasing their spouses and God.
    8. Marriage is a gift from God but so is singleness.
      1. If you do get married, Paul advises that you should remain married. However, God does provide exceptions for divorce i.e. abandonment by an
        unbeliever, abuse and fornication.
      2. God wants you to have a prosperous, thriving marriage in which you stay with your spouse forever.
    9. Be primarily concerned with keeping the commandments of God, and do not try to be someone you're not. In other words, be satisfied with whatever
      gifts God has given you.
      1. If you are married, be satisfied with your marriage relationship.
      2. If you are single, be satisfied as a single person.
    10. If a single person decides to get married, it is okay; it is not a sin.
    11. Paul knew the challenges that marriage brings and so he encouraged singleness.
      1. It is hard work to bring your mind into agreement with another person's mind.
    12. Married people will ultimately have to figure out how to successfully live with one another. God is calling them to a higher level of devotion to Him,
      both individually and as a unit within the marriage (v. 29).
    13. Single people should ask themselves the questions, "Why am I single at this time? What is it that God wants to do with my life while I am single?"
    14. Don't waste the precious days of singleness. Use your gifts, talents and abilities to help build God's kingdom. Take time to prepare yourself for
      marriage if you would like to be married.
    15. Take advantage of what you can do for the Kingdom of God while you are single.

Scripture References:

  • 1 Corinthians 7:1-40
Pastor Robert Bagonza
Redeemed Church